|
SAC-isms
Found this list on a BBS back in the late 1980s... source unknown.
ATC -- American Toy Company
ATC -- Afraid To go to Combat
MAC -- Maybe Airplane Come
TAC -- Totally Authentic Chaos
MATS -- My Ass Travels Slow
Decades of experience unhampered by progress
No "why" questions!
That sounds like a plan
To err is human, to forgive is not TAC policy
If its not mandatory, its prohibited
That's not what the book says
50% of the flight surgeons graduated in the bottom half of their class
Win or lose, you lose
A suck for SAC is a blow for humanity
Trust me!
You won't pull more alert if you live on base
Wing Priorities:
1) Christmas Party
2) Aerobics
3) OWC Luncheon
4) EWO
We're glad to be here
And we're glad you're here
TAC is like a big fan:
Stand in front of it: it blows;
Stand behind it: it sucks;
Stand beside it: it does nothing for you
When I leave SAC, I'll need to sleep in the gutter and ___ some ___ to get my self respect back
SAC: Simulate, Authenticate, and Cheat
This will be an open Q&A session. Ask about anything that you're not satisfied with. However, all questions will be approved prior to the meeting
Working for SAC is like being a nail -- if your head sticks up, it gets hammered flat
Disease of Colonels: When you tell your troops to do something and then reject it after they've done it because it's not what you wanted (Great for buying shoes but a lousy way to inspire trust and confidence)
Sleep tight tonight -- your Air Force is wide awake
You're the only one available
The IG is on final
If I catch the guy that squealed to the IG, his ass is grass! -- Col. Wally Hertzog
A suck for SAC is a blow for Peace
This isn't a popularity contest
You've got to be able to get along with them
SAC Motto: The next 24 hours is the most critical.
SAC wing personnel are like a log floating down the river with
hundreds of ants on it... each one thinking he's guiding the log.
There is no double standard
Why not Minot
Freezin's the reason
I wanted to come north
There are only two ways out of SAC: death or retirement
Stages of SAC decision process:
a. We're thinking about you for...
b. We want you to...
c. You WILL...
d. No stigma is attached...
Harsh but unfair
Peace is our Profession -- War is just a Hobby
War is our Profession -- We're not sure what Peace is, yet
War is our Profession -- Peace means unemployment
Trolling for taskings
Flexibility is the key to airpower -- Indecision is the key to flexibility
TAC exercises are like practice bleeding
A) It feels good when you stop
B) Practice doesn't help you do better next time
C) Practice makes you weaker
I need an Alert tour so I can get some time off
SACumcision/SACumcised
There's the saying "you can lead a horse to water but you can't
make him drink". SAC didn't buy that; they said
"hold his head underwater and suck on his butt... the water will flow".
SAC exercises are as effective as practicing bleeding - it doesn't make you better next time, in fact it makes you weaker
If you're a pilot, does that mean that you are ___
Weatherguessers
Contradiction in terms:
Military Intelligence;
Military precision;
Support Agencies
Staff will fly at least once a week
There is no stigma attached to what we are going to do to you
Crew Quotes
Scheduling is working it
I was on C2
Box Nastie
Nothing's too good for the Alert Force
Mass parking area
SAC YORF
Nothing is too good for the crew force
It's code 1
FNAGA
Line of sight scheduling
Rent-A-Crowd
Same day, same sky
The schedule's never final until it's flown
Being a crewmember in SAC is like a bitch in heat: You're always
running; someone's always after you; stop once and you're f%#ked.
1 CEVG: Critique Everything to death Vestige of a once respectable Group
You have to go out -- you don't have to come back
50% of the pilots graduated in the bottom half of their class
Taxi on the yellow line, take off on the white line, turn at the circles, refuel at the squares, bomb the triangles, keep the green side up and the white side down
It must be a good bird, it just came out of phase
But this is the can bird!
Boy, things are going to change when I get to Stanboard!
Commit aviation
That was a copilot landing
Stan Board: White throated buddy f%*kers
I promise I won't ___ in your mouth
We penetrate deeper, go down lower, and drop the biggest loads
Animals on a B-52:
a. Hydraulic SEALS
b. Crosswind CRABS
c. Bleed air DUCKS
d. TA PUPS
e. Heading BUGS
f. Crew DOGS
g. COCK pit
h. Survival KIT
i. BIRD s%$t
j. bomb BAY
k. engine POD
I'm OK, you're Q3
SAC Trained Killers
Gosh, I love the smell of napalm in the morning
SAC Form 1
EP for Brainfade: BRAIN - ENGAGE
Navy Common - 243.0
Winchester - 303.0
Remington - 300.6
Authenticate: HS, TU, TD, SH, FU, EM, DS, WD, UY, AH, PU
That's in coordination
We're working that
Not invented here
But, they didn't teach that at ___
Christmas tree
White top
What a goatrope
RCH
BCH
Game the system
It's deja vu all over again
Queeratrons
Didn't they teach you that at the 329th?
I've got to send a message to SAC... (flush)
I've got to give birth to a [fill in applicable crew position]
Chinese Landing Ä One Wing Low
TAC Laws of motion:
1) An object in motion will always be headed in the wrong direction
2) An object at rest will always be in the wrong place
3) The energy required to change either of these states will always be more than you wish to expend, but never so much as to make the task prospectively impossible
Trim. TRIM. TRIM!!!
It's a trainerism
French common - HF 6969
Give scheduling a call
Scheduling must have had a good reason for doing that
Boy, things are going to change when I get to Scheduling!
Get what you can, log what you need
Honor thy airspeed at all times, lest the ground rise up and smite thee
Jet noise Ä the sound of freedom
You know, a BUFF has the power of twelve railroad locomotives, thirty miles of wiring, and enough sheet metal to make fifty thousand trash cans; and that's how it flies: like twelve locomotives dragging fifty thousand trash cans with thirty miles of wire
BUFFs penetrate deeper, stay down longer, and drop bigger loads
Slip the surlies
Give a monkey enough bananas and you can teach him to fly anything
Steam jet
Water wagon
Trash hauler
Big, Ugly, Fat, er, Fellow
R stands for Relief
E stands for Extra thrust
G stands for Gutless
If we get any more female pilots, we'll have to quit calling it a cockpit and start calling it the box office
The last time I had sex was 1956... only three hours ago
I thought the EW had it
The schedule is bleeding
The DO's a great guy, isn't he?
We'd better give that guy a strong copilot
Let's make him an instructor, get his hands off the yoke
Only the best guys go to training flight
I don't know, let's ask Stanboard
I don't know, let's ask CEVG
I can fly anything
I have 6000 hours, 5000 hours instrument time
B-52s were my first choice
Crewdog
Crew canine
Toad
Green Lizard
The FB-111 is a fine airplane -- if we ever go to war with Canada
If the minimum wasn't good enough, it wouldn't be the minimum
Naviguesser
Radiator
Nothing is more useless than:
A) Runway behind you;
B) Altitude above you;
C) Airspeed you don't have
Yes sir, sure we can take those 400 extra flying hours
Yes sir, sure wm till they glow, then shoot 'em in the dark
Never forget that your airplane was made by the lowest bidder
On mission planning day, Staff will do nothing but mission plan
Never forget that your survival equipment was made by the lowest bidder
You can get just as drunk on water, as you can on land
My grease low level light is on
My crew was on leave
My crew was TDY
My AC was TDY
The Co didn't follow through
The Gunner lost it
Fighter puke's definition of foreplay: Six hours of begging
Fight to fly, fly to fight, fight to win
Lose sight, lose the fight
Leadership
Would I lie to you?
It just don't get any better than this
Wait 'til the boss comes back and ask him
I'm a dot
It just doesn't matter
You can't win
You can't even break even
You can't get out of the game
Everybody knows that
Stir the pot
Trust them, they must know what they're doing
Do as I say, not as I do
That's not my department
No one told me to go ahead
I'm waiting for an okay
How did I know this was different?
That's his job, not mine
We don't make any misteakes
I didn't think it was very important
I'm so busy, I just can't get around to it
I thought I told you
I`m not paranoid, regardless of what all those people who are out to get me say
Are you paranoid if they really are out to get you?
The good deals just keep on coming
One good deal after another
Screw up, move up
Listen to the Cluebird
F*%k up, move up
Punishment is its own reward
I'd rather be lucky than good
He's not a happy camper
Force to fit, file to hide, paint to cover
I'd rather be lucky than smart
My fun meter is pegged
Three biggest lies:
A) I did it;
B) I didn't do it;
C) I can't remember
I'm clueless
RTFQ
RTFA
He hasn't got a clue
I guess that means we'll have to take more from them
Free the Alert hostages!
I only just got here myself
Make sure to tell that reporter how happy you are
Disapproved. Resubmit in thirty days for further disapproval.
Life's a piece of s$*t
I feel like I've been eaten by a wolf and s*%t over a cliff
Are we having fun yet?
That's the way we've always done it
I didn't know you were in a hurry for it
It's just one good deal after another
I'll have the answer for you in a minute
We've never done that before
If he wanted us to do it, he would have told us
I don't know if I can take any more good deals
Attitude check
I know you believe you understand what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant
Someone must have taken it out of my box
I thought someone else turned that in
We lost it while TDY
It must have been put in the wrong box
No one told me
It wasn't on the schedule
I didn't realize it was due today
It must still be in distribution
I haven't been here
I guess I didn't notice it
I wasn't hired to do that
F%*k you very much
I don't know
I don't care
It doesn't make any difference
Can they do that?
They can't do that, can they?
Let's go check out the BX (winter)
Let's go check out the babes at the BX (summer)
They is us
Hi! I'm from ___ and I'm only here to help
It's only a cold sore
I'm not the regular crew chief
Alert sucks
But that's not the way we did it in SAC!
But back at Base X we did it this way...
They didn't teach us that at the 329th!
We, the unwilling, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful
We have done so much, for so long, with so little, we are now qualified to
do anything with nothing
F*^k 'em if they can't take a joke
The check is in the mail
We're only here to help
Conventional Wisdom
Do as I say, not as I do
Measure with a micrometer; cut with an ax
It must be right, its in the book
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed fixing anyway
The earliest Christian gets eaten by the hungriest lion
Live every day like it will be your last - eventually you'll be right
When everyone is kicking you in the tail, at least you know you're out in front
If half the people think you go too far, and the other half think you don't go far enough, you must be doing something right
No good deed goes unpunished
You can get away with anything -- once
There are no right answers; some answers are better than others
Someone who knows what he's doing is the enemy of all those who don't
Tell your boss what you think of him, and the truth shall set you free
It's a reg - it's not supposed to make sense
Don't trust anyone. -- Maj Gen Eugene E. Habinger
Don't second guess yourself; make the best decision you can in the time you have to make it
No amount of planning can replace dumb luck
A double standard is better than no standard at all
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail
Failure to decide is itself a decision
If you can't stand the answer, don't ask the question!
Maximum reward is minimum punishment
For every action there is a greater and opposite overreaction
In a game without rules, everyone is the Enemy. And only one man is the winner. -- Lt Col Eugene E. Habinger (now Maj Gen)
Nothing's fact 'till it's history, and even then it's debatable
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself
Better is the enemy of good enough
When you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow
Keep them busy so they won't get into trouble
Personnel: If their lips are moving, they're lying
The angle of the dangle is proportional to the heat of the meat
Lack of punishment is its own reward
Do unto others what they would do unto you but do it first
Never take life too seriously -- you'll never get out of it alive
Return to main page
|